Everything you need to know to be a star bridesmaid
You’ve been asked to be a bridesmaid—major yay! Being a bridesmaid is a huge honor and a whole lot of fun. You’ll get to glam up with your besties before the ceremony, then glide up the aisle in a gorgeous dress.
Let’s be real, though. This role also comes with a big dose of responsibility. You’re not just there to sip Prosecco and pose for photos—you’re a key player in making sure the wedding day runs smoothly. You’ll have to wear a lot of hats, from assistant event planner to fashion guru. Phew! But no need to panic, because whether you’re a seasoned pro or a first-timer, our ultimate bridesmaid checklist is going to be your trusty guide through the whole shebang.
So let’s look at the various bridesmaid duties you’ll need to tackle, both before the wedding and on the big day.
The ultimate bridesmaid checklist
1. Get the 411 on the wedding details
First things first, you’ve got to get the lowdown on all the wedding info—date, venue, theme, color scheme, you name it. Make sure you’re in the loop so you can plan your role accordingly. This is the foundation for all your bridesmaid responsibilities, so don’t skip this step! Ideally, go full ‘power executive’ and keep all the key info together in a notebook or spreadsheet.
2. Keep the group chat rolling
Whether it’s on WhatsApp or Messenger, you’ll all need a space for the bride and bridesmaids to connect. If the bride is busy, take the initiative and get the ball rolling by encouraging people to swap ideas and tips. For instance, does anyone in the group know the best florist or wedding band in town? This is your chance to draw on everyone’s expertise.
3. Be a social media guru
With the bride’s permission, help build up a social media buzz for the big day by creating a wedding hashtag. Then share photos of pre-wedding events like the bachelorette and bridal shower. And after the wedding, you can offer to help pick out the best photos to post.
4. Help with picking the bridesmaid dresses
Put your fashion guru hat on and do some research on bridesmaid dress trends, so that you can help the bride make that all-important decision on what her besties will be wearing. Also, look into wedding color palette pitfalls to avoid—trust us, it’s a minefield!
Save the bride a whole lot of hassle and hair-tearing by helping to coordinate everyone’s attendance at fittings and alterations. Most importantly, make sure that all the gals are happy with the outfits they’ll be wearing—which might involve a bit of tactful negotiation. Who knew weddings required so much diplomacy?
5. Help with bridal shower planning
One of your key bridesmaid duties is helping to plan an amazing bridal shower. Whether it’s a boozy brunch at a cute café in Hoboken or a fancy BBQ in Montclair, pitch in with ideas and coordinate with the other bridesmaids. Remember—everyone will have their own idea of fun, but in the end, it’s all about what the bride wants. Don’t let anyone else dominate with their agenda.
6. Organize the bachelorette party
It’s time to let loose! Planning the bachelorette party is often the most fun part of your bridesmaid responsibilities. Whether it’s a wild night out in Atlantic City or a cozy weekend in the Catskills, tailor the celebration to the bride’s personality and group dynamics. Just make sure to communicate with everyone involved to keep it drama-free. Also, be mindful that people might have different budget considerations.
Check out our Best New Jersey Bachelorette Party Ideas.
7. Be a support system for the bride
Weddings can be stressful, and the bride might need a shoulder to cry on or someone to vent to. Be that person. Whether it’s a late-night phone call or a quick coffee break, show her you’re there for her. Be on hand with tissues and cocktails at all hours—it’s a big part of the job.
8. Assist with wedding DIY projects
Is the bride into DIY or planning a budget wedding? Whether it’s making centerpieces or crafting wedding favors, lend a hand with any wedding projects so that she doesn’t feel overwhelmed. Not only will it take some of the load off her, but it’s also a great way to bond. So be ready with a glue stick and a big smile!
9. Go with the bride to vendor appointments
Choosing vendors can be a hassle and a half. If the bride asks, give her moral support on vendor appointments. Whether it’s cake tasting in Jersey City or florist shopping in Paramus, your input might be just what she needs to make a decision. Plus, it’s a fun way to spend a day!
Check out our list of amazing New Jersey wedding vendors and our guide to wedding menu tasting etiquette.
10. Help manage the guest list
The guest list is one of the trickiest parts of wedding planning. Help the bride keep track of RSVPs and follow up with guests who haven’t responded. The earlier she has firm numbers, the better.
11. Help with the rehearsal and dinner
The rehearsal is where you’ll learn the flow of the ceremony, and the dinner afterwards is a great way to relax before the big day. Be ready to help with getting everyone gathered and coordinated at the walk-through, then ask the bride if she needs help checking over the details of the dinner. This is a chance for everyone to bond, so be sure to mingle at the meal rather than sticking with the bridesmaid clique.
Remember, the bride will probably feel nervous and overwhelmed, so your job is to reassure her that it will all go smoothly when the big day dawns.
Take a look at our elegant rehearsal dinner ideas.
12. Create an emergency kit
This is a biggie! Put together a wedding day emergency kit with essentials like:
- Safety pins
- Double-sided tape
- Pain relievers
- Wet wipes
- Breath mints
Trust us, you’ll be a hero when someone needs a quick fix.
13. Be the bride’s cheerleader
On the wedding day, your most important job is to keep the bride calm and happy. Bring the good vibes and keep the champagne flowing. Your job at this moment is to make sure she feels like the star of the show.
14. Help the bride get ready
On the morning of the wedding, be there to help the bride with everything, from zipping up her dress to securing her veil. Sure, you want to look glam but don’t get so caught up in your own beauty prep that you neglect her. This is a special, intimate time, so savor the moment.
Check out our 11 Ideas for Getting Ready Wedding Photos.
15. Keep track of the timeline
Weddings run on tight schedules, and it’s easy for things to slip. Be the one with the timeline handy and keep things moving. If the photographer is supposed to arrive at noon, make sure everyone’s photo-ready.
16. Manage the bridal party
Coordinate with the other bridesmaids and groomsmen to ensure everyone is where they need to be when they need to be there. This might feel like herding cats, but hey, someone’s gotta do it!
17. Hold onto the bride’s belongings
The bride might not have a purse or anywhere to stash her phone or lipstick. Keep her essentials with you and be ready to hand them over whenever she needs them.
18. Be on bouquet duty
After the ceremony, you might need to hold the bride’s bouquet during the vows or while she’s walking down the aisle. Keep it safe and make sure it’s handed back to her at the right moment.
19. Help the bride with her train and veil
If the bride has a long train or veil, you’ll need to help arrange it throughout the day. Whether it’s straightening it out for photos or making sure it doesn’t get caught on anything, you’re the go-to gal for gown adjustments.
20. Handle guest questions
On the big day, guests might come to you with all sorts of questions—from where the bathroom is to what time the reception starts. Be prepared to be the go-to person for info, so the bride doesn’t have to deal with it.
21. Keep the bridal suite tidy
The bridal suite can quickly become a whirlwind of hairspray and Champagne flutes. Do a quick clean-up every so often to keep things organized and serene.
22. Coordinate with vendors
If the bride’s too busy (which she will be), you might need to liaise with vendors. Make sure that everyone from the DJ to the caterer is on the same page with the timeline.
23. Take candid photos
While there will probably be a professional photographer, don’t be shy about snapping some behind-the-scenes pics. These candid moments are often the ones that everyone looks back on and loves. So get some good filter apps installed on your phone!
24. Prepare a toast
Were you asked to give a toast at the reception? Take a breath. It can feel super nerve-wracking but remember you’ll have a sympathetic and happy audience around you. Prepare something heartfelt and lighthearted, and don’t be shy about being a little sentimental. Keep it short and sweet, and don’t forget to raise your glass!
25. Keep an eye on the bride’s needs
Throughout the day, check in with the bride to see if she needs anything. Water, a snack, or a break from a yammering relative. Anticipate her needs so that she doesn’t have to ask.
26. Be the dance floor motivator
Once the party kicks off, get the dance floor started! Encourage guests to join in, and aim to keep the energy up. This way, the bride and groom will have the time of their lives.
27. Gather gifts and cards
At the end of the night, help gather any presents or cards the couple might have received. Make sure everything gets to a safe place and that the bride knows where you’ve stashed them.
28. Help with the send-off
If the couple is planning a grand exit—think sparklers or a classic car—help organize the guests and make sure everything goes off without a hitch. You want everyone to be assembled for the big moment!
29. Ensure a smooth getaway
If the couple is heading straight off on their honeymoon or just back to their hotel, make sure they have everything they need before setting off into wedded bliss. Gather up some groomsmen to help with their suitcases, if needed.
30. Debrief and celebrate
After the big day, arrange a post-wedding brunch where the bridal party can share stories and pics to celebrate a job well done. Being a bridesmaid is hard work—you deserve some downtime, too!
You’ve got this, bridesmaid!
Remember, it’s all about balance. While you have responsibilities (and they’re important!), don’t forget that it’s all about celebrating the bride and having fun along the way. Enjoy every minute!
Planning a wedding of your own? Don’t forget to check out our 7 golden rules for choosing your bridesmaids.
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